Father of Mine
by Sinner's Hallow
Summary: AU PostOotP Full Summary Inside: With the news of the mysterious death of his wife, Snape has very little left in the world except his daughter, whom up until this point he has had little contact with.
1. Wake Up Call

**Disclaimer:** The usually technical stuff, such as I do not own Harry Potter or anything pertaining to it that is already copyrighted and owned by J.K. Rowling. I do however own any and all characters that are not apparent of the original Harry Potter Books and I also own the plot of this story, so nah!

**Full Summary: **Snape is truly now completely alone in the world, with the news of the mysterious death of his wife, he has very little to live for except perhaps the love and care of his daughter, whom up until this point he has had little to no contact with. Can his daughter become the last bit of sunshine to wash away his rainy days, or will his heart completely turn to ice. As if their family issues wasn't enough, we can forget the Boy-Who-Lived and Voldemort. While the former may actually prove of use to the Sinai in getting to know her new father, Voldemort has something brewing up his sleeve. After all, not even Sinai is quite sure how or why her mother died...

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* * *

****July 22, 1996  
****Hogwarts - Snape's Room**

Snape sat staring down at the half-empty glass of Fire Whiskey he had been drinking for the pass hour or so. He had managed to empty more than half of the contents of the bottle that now sat on the small table beside him. The soft light from the fire, which offered him no warmth despite how close he sat to it, reflected through the clear glass of the Fire-Whiskey bottle casting a beautiful strained glass look upon the dark stone walls of his room.

He didn't seem to notice it though, he didn't appear to notice anything at all except for the crystal glass in his hands and the contents therein. The normally proud and confident, intimidating man that was known as Severus Snape looked absolutely haggard, and felt just as bad if not worse.

He was paler than ever, his hair fell in a tumble around his face, hiding the dark rings under his bloodshot eyes. If anyone had dared into his quarter then, they would have found a worn down defeated man. They would have seen the tears that roll down his face as he sought to drown his pains in the liquor before him.

His eyes were glazed over, his gaze piercing through the glass in his hands and rather he saw the events that led him to this particular pitiful point in his life.

Flashback

Severus had been in the having lunch with the rest of the staff in the Great Hall. Since it was still summer vacation, it was thankfully vacant of the usually noisy chatter of the students. There was only the light quiet conversation of his colleagues, but they were nothing like the students, something he was eternally grateful for.

It was nearing the start of term, so these quiet meals would soon come to an end, and lord knew he would miss the quietness of them. But all things come to an end, as he was more than aware of, that though did not stop him from his sometimes wishful thinking.

As he had been drawn into a conversation over a particular herb he had asked Sprout to grow for him, a black bird flew in through on of the open windows. Severus didn't pay it any mind, as it was about time for mail to be coming through anyways. It wasn't until said bird landed in front of him on the table did it gain his attention.

Severus was never one to receive idle mail, and since he wasn't expecting a letter from anyone he was more than a little suspicious of the bird. His eyes narrowed as he stared at the creature, which in turned stared right back at him. Their little staring contest lasted all but a few minutes before someone cleared their throat.

"I don't think he'll bite you Severus," The aged voice carried amusement in it, but then again Albus always found humor in just about any situation. Why would this one be any different?

Severus rolled his eyes slightly and relieved the bird of its burden and dismissing it. The bird seemed just has happy to leave he noted before he turned its gaze down to the envelope in his hand. There was nothing written on the front of it aside from his name and address, not even a return address. That particular bit did nothing to alleviate some of his suspicion.

It was then it turned the envelope over on its back did he find anything that might help him figure out whom it was from. Written across the back, was a single line written in ; a single phase that would completely shatter his world forever.

_**Das Leben und die Liebe sind flüchtige Sachen, aber gleichmäßig im Tod, leben sie auf... Sie benötigt Sie**_

The minute he saw those words, their translation immediate in his trained mind, he felt like he would fall to pieces right where he sat. It was perhaps with the last bit of energy he could muster that he rose up from the table in silences, and left without a word to anyone.

End of Flashback

That had been about 4 hours ago, and he stilled hadn't actually opened the letter, the letters written on the back were all he needed to know. She was dead. His wife, his beautiful, loving Rosalind was dead...

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**Translation:** Life and love are fleeting, but even in death they live on...she needs you.

**A/N:** This is my first Fanfiction, so I do apologize for any spelling errors and the like, since I don't have a beta to catch what I miss it may be a little harsh on the eyes. Again I apologize.

Also seeing as this is my first FF, I appreciate any and all **constructive** feedback, even ideas of maybe something you'd like to see in the story. I just came up with the idea at 6am so not everything is worked out, but I hope it goes smoothly enough.

**Update:** **_9/26/05_**

**The only change made was the date**.


	2. Drastic Changes: Part 1

**Disclaimer:** The usually technical stuff, such as I do not own Harry Potter or anything pertaining to it that is already copyrighted and owned by J.K. Rowling. I do however own any and all characters that are not apart of the original Harry Potter Books (i.e.: Luke, Sinai, etc) and I also own the plot of this story, so there!

** July 25 - 11am  
Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry**

Severus strode silently from the Headmaster's office, his pace unusually slow and leisurely compared to his normal smooth and quick pace. It was probably to do with the depression he had fallen into since the arrival of the letter; which still remained unopened on the mantel above his fireplace. He didn't dare open it, the words written upon the back of the envelope were enough to cut him to the quick, so he could imagine, with a morbid interest, what the content of the actually letter would do to him. He doubted two bottles of Fire Whiskey would be enough to numb him then, and even now as he thought back on it, he could feel his chest constrict making it harder to breathe.

So in light of the new mission Albus had set him on, he did his best to push the thoughts aside in favor of what he was to do. He was going to receive Potter from his muggle relatives, Severus could feel the sneer that pulled at his lips of the thought of having to go pick the boy up. It was not so much because he loathed to see the boy, as he and Potter had come to a sort of mutual understanding after the death of his Godfather, it was those _relatives_ of his Severus had no wish to see.

_Prejudice, discriminating non-magical filth,_ Severus found himself thinking vehemently, _It's muggles like them that make Voldemort's cause oh-so appealing._

As Severus turned a series of corners, descended down various staircases, he made his way back to his office, where he planned to Floo directly to Potter's house, he found himself actually enjoying the thought of having to deal with Potter's insufferable relatives, if only because he could take his misery out on them. Perhaps they didn't exactly deserve the full extent of his pain and anguish from the sudden loss of his wife, but they did deserve a sharp talking to for how they treated the boy. Certainly Severus was not overly fond of the boy, everyone knew that, and he made no means to hide it, but that didn't mean he approved, though, of the way they treated him.

Harry Potter or not; Son of his worse enemy James Potter or not, **no child**deserved to be treated like that or forced to endure such mental abuse in any form. This was one of those things he actually felt sorry for Potter over, and there really weren't many, in a grand total there was a long list of 4 things he actually pitied Potter over.

_1. The death of his parents._ No matter who his parents were, no matter how much he may have **hated** and **loathed** James, Severus had never once wished his death. Especially not Lily's either, but then again there were no conflicting emotions between he and her, so she was as innocent as the next in a time of war. Severus was a firm believer in the saying: "A parent should never have to bury their child." But in this case, said child hadn't even have the chance to _know_ his parents let alone bury them, and that was just as saddening..

_2. Death of Sirius._ Severus would be the first to tell anyone, that he had absolutely no love for the mutt and honestly wouldn't mind seeing him tortured. But at least he had a reason for it, honestly, nearly getting killed because of said mutt is more than enough justification in his books.

He did however sympathizer with Potter over the loss over him, more so now than ever given the own loss of his wife. The only difference was, Potter had lost everything he could truly call family, sure he still had Lupin (who Severus liked more than Sirius to the point of civil conversation, but not much beyond that), but he could easily see that Lupin didn't have the same bond to Potter as Sirius had and the loss of it hit Harry hard. Anyone could see that if they weren't blind enough to look.

With the loss of his wife, Severus now had a very good understanding of the pain Potter was going through, and though Severus was obviously stricken by her untimely death, he still at least had his daughter. Potter had no one. (Severus didn't count the Dursley's for obvious reasons.)

_3. The Dursley's obvious abuse._ So what if the wards around the house supposedly protected Potter from Voldemort and anyone outside of his family that would do him harm. Albus, the old-blind-to-everything-but-what-he-deemed-necessary bastard obviously didn't consider the obvious neglectful treatment of the Dursley's to be of real harm to the boy. For that alone, Severus would have hexed the man many a time over if he had the strength to do so.

While there was no obvious physical abuse, aside from the boy's **obvious** malnutrition, that said nothing for his mind, and having seen into Potter's mind first hand he had a good, though rough, idea of what the boy had endured over the years, and it seriously rubbed him the wrong way.

Severus was a father after all and even though he hadn't seen his own daughter in 10 years he still had those parental instincts and if it wasn't for the fact that he was a Death Eater, a spy, and a member of the fucking Order, Severus would have forcefully taken the boy from the Dursley, Albus be damned, if only to remove him from that kind of environment.

Last but not by a long-fucking-shot least, and Severus had often mused in a cynical mood, that this was took the cake, icing and all...

_4. Burden of Saving the Wizarding World._ To say that people of the wizarding society were absolutely out of their minds and completely pathetic for falling on a boy, a child, to save them from...well_ themselves _was perhaps the biggest understatement Severus could possibly think of. It was disgusting and honestly fucking ridiculous for people to do that to anyone, let alone a child no older than 16. Severus honestly didn't believe the Prophecy had much in the way of credibility, but when did anyone truly listen to him? He believed on the other hand, that if people truly wanted to save their society, **they** needed to band together and fight back instead of hiding like fucking cowards behind the delusion that a **boy** was going to save them from a tyrant of a wizard more than twice the boys age, with more than four times the knowledge and experience as both magically and intellectually.

It truly was a sad time in the world when a whole society had to lay such a burden on the shoulders of a child, regardless of a prophecy, it was unfair and it was cruel and for the life of him, Severus would see that the damn boy had some semblance of a goddamn life before it was over and done with.

Severus finally turned one last corner in the labyrinth of the dungeon, and pushed opened the simply wooden door of his private office. He only spared a look around finding it was as he left it, a complete and utter war-zone with papers scattered here and there. Stepping further in, he spied two completely empty Fire Whiskey bottles discard off to one side of the room next to the same chair and table he had occupied for a good two days before being forced from his quarters.

A faint sigh escaped his lips as he slid his fingers through his disheveled hair, well not necessarily a complete mess by anyone's standard but Severus, who preferred his hair out of his face; he now found it obscuring his view every other minute, but he couldn't bring himself to do anything about it, just as he couldn't bring himself to do anything about the mess that had become his quarters.

He needed it to remain this way, he mused privately, it was a change from the normal strict neatness that was usually present in this daily life. He needed something drastic, different, and while the room wasn't completely destroyed it served its purpose as a reminder of how things could change so suddenly from the norm. How he would soon have to adapt to a far more drastic change of raising a daughter.

He smiled very faintly, saddened that it had to have come to this. That it had to be something such as this to bring his daughter back to him. It had been 10 years since he had seen her last, and the thought of suddenly having the girl all to himself frightened him utterly.

What was he going to do? How did he react around her? How would she react towards him? They had both change so much since their last encounter and in his case not entirely for the better he'd admit.

But what about her, what about Sinai?

_Does she even remember me?_ It was a sad thought, one that cut deep into his heart, to the point he could feel tears venture forth. He shook his head violently, he couldn't think of things like that right now. Now he had to go and pick up Potter and be back by lunch.

He reluctantly pushed the thoughts of his daughter aside and pressed onto the fireplace. Just as he reached the mantel, his wary eyes fell to rest upon the letter he had left discarded there as if some sort of trophy . . . a symbol of the drastic turn in his life. He cringed at the sight of it, and the pain began a new.

The pain of loss, the pain of gaining something he should have never loss in the first place and the pain of having to start over with a daughter he knew so little about. Perhaps what pained him the most was how absent he had been from her life, she had grown up without him and that was enough to shatter whatever life he had left in him.

Staring at the letter for a long moment, he made a vow then and there that he wouldn't make that mistake twice. He would get to know his daughter, he would make amends for not being there when she needed him, for all of the times he should have been there even when she didn't need him. He swore on his life that he would protect her from Voldemort, from Dumbledore, from the world in which he was forced to live. The world of lies and spying and fighting and death, and lord help any that sought to harm his little girl. They would know his full wrath, and exactly just what he else was in his powers to do to those that crossed him. He would ensure Sinai had a life, a true one, not one filled with the lies of Voldemort and the twinkling manipulation of Dumbledore. So help him . . . He would provide for his daughter.

Determination set in him, Severus felt more aware of his surroundings than he had a moment ago, as if whatever haze or depression he fell into when he received the letter had morphed into absolute determination and will to protect what remained of his soul.

He smiled a grim smile at the letter than lay limp and lifeless upon the mantel, oblivious to the task Severus had set himself because of it.

"Thank you..." was all but a whisper as the words fell from Severus' lips just as he bowed his head and stepped into the fireplace, and Floo'd to Number 4, Privet Drive.

**July 25 - 7:45pm  
Train traveling from Paris to London**

The gloomy landscape that sped pass the window of the train cabin did well to reflect the mood of the occupants within. The oppressing clouds and the harsh weather coupled with the speed at which the train itself was moving caused the wind to howl loudly around the locomotive. Since their departure from Munich early that morning the weather had gotten progressively worse, the harsh windy rains had turned into small pellets of hail that bounced off of the windows and walls of the train.

The sound of the small crystalized raining down on the cars was quite soothing in an odd way. It produced a steady and smooth sound, which seemed to help draw away from the tense silence that otherwise filled the cabin.

On one side of the cabin sat an aged man; he not necessarily old by any accounts but one could see the first signs of gray beginning to show in the light brown hair that he allowed to fall almost haphazardly at his shoulders. His body was noticeably stifle and tense as he reclined in his seat, as if afraid any movement on his part would destroy the relative peace that fallen over the room.

Dark brown eyes gleamed dully, exhausted, as they skimmed over the young woman that sat across from him asleep. In silence he pulled his wand from a concealed pocket within the lining of his jacket. Allowing a quiet murmur to fall from his lips, he summoned one of the blankets from the cubbies above them and arranged it around the girl's sleeping body.

The girl shifted restlessly in her sleep leaving Luke could only watch on, saddened to see that even in sleep his young charge found no solace. Shaking his head with a soft sigh, he thought of effect Rosalind's death had had on the poor girl. It grieved him to see this same girl, who not even a week ago had been happily tending to the rather expansive garden of her mother's estate, become a hollow shell literally just over the course of one night.

Luke would be the first admit the similarities between the girl and her father in the respect of emotions. Thought Sinai wasn't nearly as bad as her father, neither of them was good at expressing their real feels openly and if it hadn't been for the fact that Luke had been with the girl since she had been born he may have missed the tale-tell signs. Luke knew what to look for, and frankly what he found when he looked at his poor charge both frightened and hurt him so.

Sinai had become so withdrawn into herself, didn't speak as much, and at times not at all; she was more like an empty shell, and it only seemed to get worse as time passed. He had lost her mother, Rosalind, but he would not lose her, not he if could help it. So it had been with a heavy yet hopeful heart he had told her that they would be relocating to Hogsmeade. He wanted to take her away from darkness that had descended upon Munich since her mother's death, he wanted to give her a chance at a fresh start.

Luke shifted slightly in his seat, his tired gaze turning toward the window to watch the storm. He allowed himself a momentarily break from his constant vigilance and took a fleeting second to lose himself in the soothing sounds of the rain and hail beating against the window and walls. He thought over the other reasons for their move to Hogsmeade, after all they could have gone anywhere, but Luke had chosen Hogsmeade for one specific reason. Severus Snape. His charge's reclusive father.

He was forced to stifle a sigh at the thought of the shifty man. The truth of the matter was that he and Severus had been good friends at one time, they had grown up together for many years and then attended Hogwarts together. In fact, he was the one that had played match-maker between Severus and Rosalind, even if that little venture had led to him having to hide out in the Room of Requirement for nearly 2 weeks afterwards from two very pissed off Slytherins; it had been worth the trouble.

Luke sad little smile formed at those fond old memories before it was pushed aside, now didn't seem like the best time to remember the fond memories of their childhood. Or perhaps it was the best time to, but Luke couldn't bring himself to stop mourning so soon. It was perhaps an act of Self-punishment, but it was one he felt he deserved.

Refocusing his train of thought back to Snape, Luke felt it was time that man truly knew his daughter. After all it had been nearly 10 years since the last time he had visited either his wife or his daughter. A fact of which Luke was none too happy with, he of course understood _why_, but that didn't . . . couldn't account for the man not being with his daughter as she grew up.

He didn't blame Severus though, not entirely, he couldn't, because the man had to stay away to protect his family. As a Death Eater, had he remained with his family it would have meant them being forced into the Dark Lords service just like Severus, which in turn would have meant that when Sinai came of age she would have had to swear loyalty to that madman as well. While at the time Severus was loyal to Voldemort, he also wanted his daughter to have a choice in the matter.

Even after Voldemort's first fall, Severus had become a spy, which made it even more to dangerous for him to visit them, because if it he was ever discovered Rosalind and the child would have been in grave danger. So for the sacrifices that Severus had made for his family, Luke could never fault him, but now . . . Luke shook his head after stealing a brief glimpse as the sleeping girl, Voldemort be damned, Sinai needed her father and Severus need to know his daughter. Time was too precious and short now to waste any longer on idle fears.


End file.
